Everyone Has The Unfortunate Event in Life

Hello, everyone!

People dies every day, and we couldn't deny it unless to accept. It's the rotation of life. Someone died and someone else born. I know it's something essential in life. However, that wasn't the topic I want to discuss here. 

I just want everyone to know that I am not strong as the people think I am. People kept seeing me as the individual who is full of enjoyment, cheerful, and positive. 

I kept bringing that because I wanted everyone to be comfortable with me and kept away the sadness. 

I wanted them to think that there's always the way!

I wanted them to be happy, always. 

I didn't want them to be under the pressure of life. 

I am sincerely doing that for all of you. Probably, I'm too egoistic for myself. I wasn't thinking about myself, to kept up 'me' for the first place! I was a fool! Did I? I don't even know anymore!

I kept saying to everyone "There, there. You'll be alright". I gave those people my shoulders to kept their head.

But, did I deserve treated them that way? Did I? While I was not that very happy? Did I ain't happy? I didn't know! 

But, it's alright. It's alright. I know now. 

I know life is not always happy as it does. There is the variance of the feeling to make it very pleasant in life; happiness, sadness, anger, frighten, homesickness, and many more relatable. I know, all of these will keep shuffling every time. Why I'm writing this? Why? 

It's because I am sad and I want to keep telling myself I need to be stronger since I guess there are nobody cares. Befriend is good but, put too much trust on friends is a slightly dangerous. I can learn to be stronger alone. It isn't that bad. I can back myself up isn't  it?

What it is about? I ain't telling. 

You! Yes, you! Please tell me I'm wrong this time and prove it to me. 

Wholeheartedly,

Syukran Neji.